An Evening with Arthur Smith

As I said in one of my first blog entries, I'm currently rehearsing for a part in my first play. OK, this is not strictly my first acting job, but I don't think I can really count my brief appearances as fourth shepherd in a 1971 school nativity or as Julius Caesar's wife Calpurnia in a sixth form production. For the record, it was a boys school and I was 11 years of age and still with an unbroken voice and anyway, why am I trying to justify myself to a blog?

Anyhoo, I am quite fortunate in that the local drama group I joined takes all of this drama stuff very seriously indeed. Not in a po-faced "Luvvy! Daaahling!" kind of way, but in that they want to do as good a job as possible. I am embarrassed to admit that one of the things putting me off from be involved for so long was Lynda Snell's overbearing efforts to put on a village panto every year in The Archers. Although there is of course the actors and the director, there are so many others that get involved in one way or another from the provision of props, sets, sound and lighting through to setting up the venue, selling ticket sales and publicity.

It's ironic that for a play that is about football, none of the cast have much of an interest in the game itself. But then you don't have to be a cat to be in, er, Cats. So, trying to exercise my new found acting techniques I try to think of something that I am equally passionate about as a reference. I remember suggesting to my co-actor Andrew at one point that he and I could use Doctor Who (as we're both fans), but in hindsight I realise this is possibly the saddest, nerdish thing that I have ever suggested. However I would like to point out that unlike me, Andrew can't use a nine year old son as an excuse for his obsession.

Overall I am enjoying the 'Am Dram' experience immensely. There is plenty of laughs and beer to be had, which is I think is as important as the end product of the play itself (three weeks and counting)...

So there I was one evening in front of the PC and I thought that I might send an email to the play's co-author, Arthur Smith, you know, as you do. Most people know Arthur as one of the Grumpy Old Men on BBC TV and for his appearances on on Radio 4's Excess Baggage and Loose Ends. But for those of my generation, we remember him back when he was a regular at the Comedy Store. So were we in fact, going there at least once a month during the Eighties. So many of the turns we saw ended up doing quite nicely for themselves, starting off as part of the Alternative Comedy backlash to Bernard Manning and his sort of 'humour' and ending up as part of the new comedy establishment.

Ah, those were the days... Paul Merton was Paul Martin, Jo Brand was Sea Monster and Julian Clary had a Fanny and was known as the Joan Collins Fan Club. When Eddie Izzard came on, he was in a tweed jacket, not a dress, and were unsure whether he was p***ed, stoned or just plain hatstand. Turned out to be the latter, and wonderfully so. Anyway, I digress.

Back to Arthur. As well as appearances at the Store, he was on TV as (among other things) the first milkman that Richie Rich murdered on Filthy, Rich and Catflap, and the backwards speaking barman in the Red Dwarf episode called, er, Backwards. So I did a quick Google, found his website and shot off a quick email to say "Hi" and that we were doing his play. I also asked about an 'interview' that supposedly takes place between Gary Lineker and Trevor Brooking. "Was it a real recording?" I asked. I wasn't really expecting a reply, especially since his website does warn that unless an email is 'very interesting indeed' then he will be 'not arsed to reply. I thought fair play, at least he's honest.

But blow me if he didn't reply, and with a promptness that puts my emailing to shame. He was pleased to hear that the play was still going and that the original recording was made by a then unknown Alaistair McGowan impersonating both Gary and Trevor. He then went on to wish us well in the production, hoped that the swearing wasn't too much for the audience, and that maybe he'd come by if there were any tickets left.

What a nice chap, I thought. So I thanked him for his reply, pointed out that we were in Norfolk and that it was a bit of a trek from Balham (where he lives) and told him a bit about how we too had worried about the swearing. The group had actually gone through the whole play to justify every rude word, taking out only those we thought were out of context or just too plain naughty to use. However, I said to Arthur, if he did want to see us he was welcome, and that he could bring his 'Grumpy Old Men' colleague Rick Wakeman along with him, as he just lives round the corner from us.

Arthur replied again and just as promptly as before, telling me a story about how they had to contend with the more sweary bits when they toured with the original production. And Mr Smith was even kind enough to give me a few words to include in the program. It also turned out that he used to go to the UEA in Norwich in 1975 (where the picture above was taken), and that he had an ex-girlfriend from the town where I live. Small world.

So if you ever read this Arthur, then once again thanks for taking the time out to reply. You really made my day.

That is assuming it was you, and not some spotty 12 year old hacker just winding me up...